A tiny human just tried to shove me down the basement stairs. And giggled about it. I'm not laughing. I'm trying to remember it's wrong to scream at small children … well, other people's children. Mine deserved it and emerged relatively normal. I'm a nanny, but Mary Poppins I’m not; I have brass knuckles in my tapestry bag, and I will knock your ass out with my big umbrella. The tiny human finds himself on the Time-Out Step. I take a deep breath, choose my words carefully, and deliver them in the quiet voice of seriousness, changing giggling to tears.
Elizabeth Fenley taught English for fifteen years. She currently works as a nanny and lives in a joyfully Empty Nest with six delightfully boisterous dogs.